loss

found this on Facebook from someone i don't know in response to the horrible accident yesterday morning:

I've been thinking about the tragic car accident that claimed the life of a Shelburne boy yesterday, wanted to share what I've learned about supporting people who've experienced a loss. I've always felt hopelessly inadequate at expressing sympathy. But when my sister died, many of you taught me how to support someone through a sudden loss. (thank you)
1) Call. If the person can't talk, he or she won't answer. Leave a message.
2) Provide concrete help--"I'd like to walk your dogs, clean your house, sit with you, drive you to the funeral home, make any calls to people who need to know."
3) Let them talk about the person who died. You aren't making it worse by bringing it up. They are already thinking about it and having friends gloss it over is painful and uncomfortable.
4) If you didn't know the person who died, ask questions about what he/she liked, ask to see photos, find out who they were. If you knew the person who died, share stories of him/her that your friend may not know or talk about shared experiences.
5) Repeat all of the above.

None of this is easy but the most meaningful things rarely are.